Stress

I originally thought that it was the people that were close to you that made life easier and more enjoyable. I have come to find in wedding planning that it is these people that are making my job as a bride more difficult and beyond stressful. I woke up this morning feeling light and excited. Giddy even. I was feeling better, having kicked the flu into next week (well, hopefully into three weeks from now when I plan on crashing.)


And then I get this email from my father. An email that he has sent to his listserv. To his clients. To his friends. With the title "My Daughter is Getting Married This Weekend". I think to myself "wow, he's excited. That's great!" Until I open the email. He calls Chris my "sex slave" and, in more words, lets me and the whole world know that I am so cold as to only keep them informed by email. This email, being the one sent to the bridal party and parents informing them of the times that they need to be places, because it's not the invitation time. It's a special time. Oh, and in my letting people know about where to be and when, that I forgot to mention the wedding! Obviously, I don't care about the wedding, the marriage. I care about the photos and the party. He then reposted my entire email.


A father is the person that should be there to support you. Defend you. And yet, I continually find myself protecting myself from this man that forked over some sperm 25 years ago. At what point do you stop trying to love someone that can't love you back? It seems that the only person that gets hurt is me.


I look back over what I just wrote and I realize that it was an email. An email that I can choose to let affect me. I can decide if I'm going to get myself twisted up in knots of the perception of events from a selfish, self-absorbed man. I decide how I'm going to feel.


I decide that I'm done. I decide that I am not going to spread myself so thin this weekend just to make others feel special. I've done what I can up to this point and now it's about Chris and I. It's about the life together that we are going to formalize on Saturday. It's not about making this person feel special or making that person feel included above others because they're supposed to be treated better because they're closer in the hierarchy.


It feels good to wash my hands and realize that what's done is done. People are who they are and I can't change them. The wedding will happen. The people that love us will be there. And it will be the best day of my life.

The Chocolate Bars

They've long been packed away in the wall o'boxes, but I found a photo!

I made these for the Rehearsal Dinner. We had all these photos and no where to put them. So why not on chocolate!








I bought the giant Hershey bars at Ralphs when they went on crazy sale after the holidays. One wrapper off, a little double-sided tape, and they were done! Although, it was at this point that Chris decided I had completely gone over board with this wedding stuff. Or was it with the water bottles? Perhaps I have gone completely off my rocker...





They'll just be hanging out at the Rehearsal Dinner, on a table or something. Each one is a different photo, half of Chris and half of me. I think our guests will get a kick out them! And who can turn down chocolate?

Posing like Paris

Can this be a good thing?

My most favorite Aunt is obsessed with magazines... the Life & Style variety. She buys them every week at a little store around the corner from her apartment in TriBeCa. Last time she was here, she instructed me on the art form of posing. You know, chin down, arms back, chest out, tummy in, etc. I spent most of the "lesson" laughing hysterically!

With all the wedding posing and photos happening I thought I might try out a pose. So on our Last Single Night Out I put the camera on the tripod and snapped a picture.

I'm definitely digging the face angle. Must work that on Saturday.

Welcome to Hollywood!

The first round of Out of Towner boxes were dropped off last night. I totally forgot to take a picture of the inside, but they were super sweet. Lots of snacks, our bottles of water and a welcome postcard with a photo of the Roosevelt.

I also found (err, my bridesmaid MP found) white tissue paper with gold stars. It was perfect for our Welcome to Hollywood theme!

Unfortunately, I have a feeling that the Holiday Inn does not employ people that are smart enough to follow directions as I got no less than 3 phone calls when Chris dropped them off last night. If they can't accept them without issue, I have a feeling they will not be handed out without issue. So, fingers crossed that my guests get their snack on, and not the janitor.

Sox = Socks

Perhaps I went overboard.

... but what better way to honor the Red Sox :-) I actually stole the idea from a wedding guest at my father's second wedding in 1989. The videographer comes around to this guy and they all talk to the camera "I'm so happy for you blah blah blah." And at the end, he says "Red Socks Jeffrey, Red Sox." And the camera pans down to his red socks! I've loved it since I was a kid and always secretly hoped I would marry a Red Sox fan.

But people don't make red socks. They should! I think it's an awesome fashion statement. A hint of color. So I found some white tuxedo socks on eBay and then dyed the crap out of them in my kitchen sink. I also dyed the sink and my middle finger.

The groomsmen don't know they're rocking them yet, and I hope they'll rock them hard. And if they don't want to, I don't care. This is my wedding and they'll do what I tell them to do.

It's 6:00 AM

... and I can't sleep! I tried to fight it by staying in bed, but my eyes were wide open and my brain started sprinting. Running through the enormous list of things to do. Well, I guess it's minor compared to what some people are going through 3 days before an event... Thank God I was born a planner. I love my dear friend and Matron of Honor, but as we drove to her ceremony site, heaped into the front seat of a Trans Am, my legs on the dashboard because there was so much shiza in the car, my hair in rollers and my tired bead-sewing hands (just an aside, I don't know how to sew) working as hard as the could to get the programs folded before we reached the church, I swore that I would be DONE with everything before the guests started rolling in to town.




















And they're rolling in today! My most favorite sorority sister HalfCent arrives at 4:00 pm in Burbank! I told her if she could fly into Burbank that it would make my entire life. I only have to go to LAX two times in this entire wedding process and one of them is heading down for my honeymoon! The HalfCent is probably the most ridiculous person I've ever met in my entire life. She's a pile of everything cool, ghetto, preppy and sophisticated there could be. A pearl-sporting, bandana rocking, hip hop dancer who just happens to be a Vanderbilt Chemistry PhD canditate. Yes, she's going to be Dr. HalfCent. A little bit of Dr. and Dr. Dre. It's an odd combination and that's what makes her so fabulous.



So, I'm wondering if today is the day it becomes real. It got real for a minute there, but that was fleeting. It was back to work and back to planning and back to errands. Today is my last day in the office. And it's just half a day! So, there's just 4 hours between me and wedding reality. Holy Shit.

Wedding Presents!

We exchanged wedding presents on Sunday night. Our last night out together before the family starts arriving. I gave him his first. He loved the cufflinks. Little tiny red socks J Then he opened the book. The first photo is this one.

He looked at it and looked at me and looked at it again, confused. Then he blurts “Is that you!? When did I take that photo?" HAHAHA, he is my favorite photographer :-)

With each photo he said “WOW!” “Who took these?” “WOW!”. Exactly the reaction that I wanted! If you’re even considering doing this, DO IT NOW. We were both starving and he didn’t touch the salad or the appetizer when they came because he was enthralled with the book. It was good!

Then it was my turn! I knew what he was getting me, but I didn’t know that it was going to be soooooooooo perfect! See, he has no idea what to buy me. Ever. And I’ll admit, I’m a picky person. So it started with him asking general questions. Then I got specific. Then I told him exactly what I wanted. Then I sent him a link. He couldn’t get the one with that I sent him, so he went to Icing on the Ring and they made it for him. And he did a FABULOUS job.

It's an emerald cut Aquamarine stone (both of our birthstones) set in white gold. Its a perfect sized cocktail ring and I love everything about it. Plus, it will be my something blue at the wedding!

It’s a great start to wedding week!

Passionate People

I want to write a reality/documentary show about passionate people. Like this guy..

This man is passionate about his hats. He loves them and realizes that each one is a work of art! He works at Baron Hats in Burbank and was probably the most helpful person I’ve ever met. Plus, he wears cool hats.

All of our groomsmen are wearing fedoras for picture time

I bought them on the corner of Hollywood and Highland from one of those kiosk guys. Then dressed them up with some ribbon (with careful guidance from Janice... THANK YOU!) and feathers. All in all, I'm pretty excited with how they turned out!

But Chris has a giant head and the cheapo hat wasn’t going to do the trick. He needed a fancy hat. Plus, he’s the groom. So he gets a fancy hat. Gunner hooked us up with this beauty


He added all kinds of fancy stuff! The feather is situated just the right way. It's different for a serious guy, or a kidder. Chris got the kidder version. The pin is a Chicago Pin... made famous by Al Capones' seamstress. Back in the mafia day they were real diamonds or pearls and signified how rich you were. The white band is a Chicago Strap (or Chicago something else, I can't remember). Another of Al Capones' tricks. It unhooks and connects the hat to his jacket, so it doesn't blow away in the wind. Al Capone was apparently quite influential to the hat market.

We loved it so much, that we went back two days later and bought another one for Chris’ big headed Daddy! He got his enormous hat holder from his poppy.

In other news, I love celebrities. Life&Style is my guilty pleasure. I’m not so much for all of their personal lives and whatnot, but I love what they’re wearing and hair and etc. And I get giggly when I see one. It's one of the reasons I love living in LA.

So we’re talking to this guy. He seems nice enough. Has a broken foot, which brought up the conversation. Apparently he broke it while running back to his car after tagging the freeway. Nice. It went kind of like this

Chris: Oh, where can we see your work.
Guy: I work in a studio.
Me and Chris: ::Confused::
Chris: What do you do?
Guy: Oh, I’m in the Black Eyed Peas.
Me: ::WHA!?::



It was Will.I.Am!!! I almost blurted out that I wanted to use “I Got It From My Momma” in our Rehearsal Dinner video, but Chris vetoed me! He was a super nice guy who is also passionate about his hats. All around, I think hats are a good choice.

Our Rehearsal Dinner Video

I am so super impressed with Chris and his editing skills. I had no idea he could do this!

We will show this at the Rehearsal Dinner, the night before the wedding.

Burke Williams

My LA friends gave me a gift certificate to Burke Williams to relax before the wedding and I took advantage of it today! It was so nice to be pampered for the day. MP and I went to the gym which is conveniently right next door to the spa. A little workout to get massage ready and we headed over.

Burke Williams is my new favorite place. I love the smells and the warm robes and the fruit. The lemonade was super tasty. I think I fell asleep during my massage. Chris claims that makes it a waste of money, I say that the guy did his job!

After the massage, I had a complimentary bridal bath. This only cements the idea in my mind that it is absolutely necessary to have a giant bathtub in my home. While the milk & orange bath was really nice while I was in it, I smell a little bit like infant vomit now. Ick.

Finger Nails

My 'maids and I are getting mani & pedis on Thursday afternoon. It will be our first bonding time and some of them will be meeting for the first time! I thought I'd go with a typical french tip, but I always wear red and I love the way it looks. And after seeing this photo, I think I'm going to go for it :-)

It's a Good Thing I Dieted...

... because from here on out there's going to be a lot of food!

Tonight is our last night together. His parents fly in tomorrow and we'll have to hit the ground running. So, we're celebrating our last night as single people together. (Chris has dubbed everything we do for the last time before our wedding our Last Single X. Yesterday we folded laundry for our last time as single people. Ha). He's wanted to try Charcoal since it opened. I'm not really excited about this. I've read AWFUL reviews, so I really hope that he's right in his excitement and that it's not a crap hole. We're also exchanging wedding presents tonight!

Tomorrow night is Yamashiro with his parents. Yummy yummy sushi :-)

Tuesday I think we're going to eat at home. His mom usually takes over and creates the most amazinglyt wonderful and tasty meals that ever happened. My mouth is watering just thinking about what I might get to eat on Tuesday.

Wednesday, dinner with my mom, aunt and sister. I think we'll try a local place, Eclectic. They have the most amazing bread that I've ever tasted in my entire life. We like to order a salad, a wine flight and eat three baskets of bread. YUM!

Thursday, my bachelorette party starts at Dolce. Knowing me very well, my 'maids picked this place based on the fact that they have pumpkin raviolli as a standard on the menu. I miss carbs and am excited to stuff my face with them. Not too many though. Note to Self: Please remember that you have a slew of dresses, one that is very important, that you must fit into over the next few days. Thank You!

Friday, the Rehearsal Dinner at Lucky Strike. I'm going to eat every single Birds Nest that we ordered. Puff pastry shell filled with brie and mushroom. yummy.

Saturday, the wedding at the Roosevelt. If the food is half as good as it was at our tasting this will be the final nail in my coffin as they ship me off to the graveyard in an overdose of tasty food. I'm definitely going to have to squeeze in some serious calorie burning workouts.

The Final Product

I am so impressed with myself and my photoshop skills! I love this final product.

We decided to add the bridal party and our officiant/director. My only regret is that the BP first names are black script writing and you can only see them if you're really really close. Oh well.

I took it to Kinkos to have it printed. I'm not sure what's wrong with the people that work there. I gave the CD to a guy behind the counter. After spending a good 5 minutes with the CD and the computer, he printed up a receipt and told me I could pick it up the next day. I glanced down at the receipt for $60!?!? What!? He told me he was going to print it on his best color printer. The one that was currently printing a giant Hannah Montana poster for Disney. Umm, I'm sorry, it's a black and white print! He said it would be crisper. I said I didn't care. So he printed me another a receipt for $4.00. Then printed it on a grayscale printer in 2 minutes. I hate Kinkos.

It's Almost Time!

And I know it's almost time because I can see the floor! I really wish I had taken "before" pictures of the condo. It was bad. Real bad. There was shit EVERYWHERE. Every surface of every place in every corner. But the cleaning lady that Knottie Wendy55 recommended was coming on Sunday, so we had to give her some surfaces to clean. Oh wait!? No, she's coming on Saturday... because Chris told her to. See, the problem with speaking SOME Spanish is that people think you know what you're talking about. And unfortunately Chris slept for most of the class when they taught days of the week. Anyway, she calls to confirm and we realize she's coming a day earlier than we thought she was! Oh well, we kicked into high gear so she could do her job. And clean she did!

I can see my kitchen.

I can see my living room.

I can see the chair. (This was the center of the chaos. Most of the stuff was piled in or around this area. I haven't seen that chair in at least 2 months.)

Because all my shit is here

And today was going to be blog/bio update day. We'll have to wait for the pro pics from Jonilyn & Rob.

Ring Shots

I adore ring shots. They can be done so interestingly and so differently. Like snowflakes, there's no reason to have the same one twice!

When I came across this post on the Image is Found Blog, my mouth dropped! This one is by far my most favorite!

And the rings are already on the right keys!

That's Going to be ME!

Wedding Bee and The Knot are my two most favorite sites on the internet at the moment. I was just perusing wedding bee when I came across this post and this picture from Mrs.Licorice (photo by Heidi Geldhauser of Our Labor of Love).

That's going to be me next weekend! And I just realized that I'm getting married in 9 days. Just really really realized it. I mean, I know it was coming... but I got the stomach sinking, holy crap, it's really here, and, wow. Then I grinned. :-)

THE LAMP!!!

I Love Lamp.

And I ADORE this one from Pottery Barn. It's currently sitting in my living room, compliments of Chris' parents. :-)

Chris hooked it into the entertainment system under lights, so it's on a dimmer and turns on/off from the light switch on the wall.

We've Got a Man Down

We've lost one of our soliders. One of our groomsmen just realized he can't afford to make it to the wedding. I'm torn about how I feel and Chris is obviously upset. Here's the thing. We've been engaged for 15 months and we asked all of the bridal party to be our 'maids and 'men almost a year ago! He didn't realize he had no money until 10 days before the wedding?

Then I think of how sad he must be to not be able to make it. I remember what a huge expense it is to make it out here and I am overwhelmed with gratitude for the folks that are making the trek to witness our big day.

So, we're trudging forward with our lopsided wedding party in t-9 days. Holy shit.

The 10 Day Weather Forecast!

It's out and it's going to be 66 and sunny!

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Are These Not the Cutest Shorts Ever!?

www.jcrew.com for $68. That seems hefty for shorts... to splurge or not to splurge. With all the money pouring out of each one of my orifices, $68 doesn't seem like so much :-)

Shoe Drama

I adore shoes. And I'm not quite sure why finding a pair to wear to the Rehearsal Dinner is sooooooooo difficult. Perhaps it's because women's feet are getting ginormous, so shoe sizes are changing. I once wore a 6.5. Now I wear a 5 or 5.5. Either I am shrinking or other people are growing and damn you marketing folks. I've found many pairs that just don't fit. boo. Nordstrom was a treasure trove of beautiful pewter heels… but NOTHING FIT! I’m not miniature!!! I’m normal sized… this should not be an issue.

This is the dress...

Perhaps I can't find the shoe because of the dress. I don't want to go gold or silver because that's boring.

When I bought the dress I asked at BCBG and they showed me this pair. AKA the pair that I adore...

But I just can't bring myself to pay $225 for something that isn't the most absolutely stunningly fabulous thing I've ever bought. And I'm a shoe whore... I've paid way more than that for something stunning, but it was the most amazing shoe I've ever seen in my life and I wear them at least once a week. My heart fills with joy when I think of those stunning kitten heels... yet, this is for another post.

SOOOOO... there was this pair.




Carlos by Carlos Santana and I found them on Zappos.com for $99. I liked them online, but in real life they are really green and I stepped right out of them. Their 5.5 is whack, it got sent back. (Thank You Zappos for prepaid by you shipping both ways. It was sweet!)

So, to ninewest.com my fingers trotted. I found a pair!



And just as I was checking out, a little sign told me that buy 2, get ‘em 30% off. Well, I reasoned that they might not work, so I should go ahead and get a second pair. And even if I have to return them, I got the first pair 30% off. It was perfect!

I continued shopping and I found a hidden pair!


They’re almost like the BCBG pair, except without the fancy stuff. Perhaps I can fancy them up myself. Perhaps another DIY project. I’ve never DIY’d a pair of shoes. Can I do it?! Perhaps I shall!

I checked retailmenot.com and snapped up a free shipping promo code, upgraded the shipping to 3 day and I will now await my shiny pewter shoes and keep fingers crossed that they will compliment the dress. If they don’t… I go barefoot. End of story.

OVERWHELMED...

... all of a sudden. Out of know where. I am utterly and totally overwhelmed. Chris has a theory that for the last 15 months this has been my/our wedding. The details and the set-up and the behind the scenes stuff has only been ours. Now, other people are getting invovled and they are messing up my flow. It's not our event anymore, it's everyone's. Perhaps it is selfish to want everything to go my way... there are other feelings and people and ideas to contend with now. I feel like I've done a pretty decent job at thinking about how others will feel and what they will need. But you can never really know until you're in it I guess.

So now everything about the wedding seems to jump on me. The menus that haven't been printed. The changes that need to be accomodated. Does everyone know that there are two vendor meal times? Did I remember to set up the brunch caterer? The programs that need to be wired together.

And sitting at work trying to focus on work stuff is NOT helping. It makes me think of the tiny ends that need to be sewn up at home. booooooooo.

Eloping is suddenly looking really lovely.

Getting Ready for Thailand

If you remember, I totally forgot we were heading to Thailand two days after the wedding... because all I can think about is the wedding! So, I've been scrambling to get it all together. We need summer clothes - shorts, bathing suits, light & airy clothes, etc. And not so many people sell those kinds of things in January.

Thank You TARGET! Target came in big for me. They have some summer stuff on the shelves and we scored big time this weekend. I grabbed a few bathing suits and a beach cover up, some shorts and a few tank tops. Chris was over in his section and the same time and we bumped in to each other with seperate and full carts! He is the proud owner of some shorts and t-shirts!

I also forced him to purchase a new pair of Rainbow flip flops as I could smell the old ones from multiple angles and distances. Unacceptable.

I've been trolling online for a while now and I'm really not finding so many options. There was a really cute pair of shorts and Banana Republic, so I ordered those. When I received them, there were the extra tall version. Stupid J, didn't read the print. I got so caught up in the excitement of finding a pair of shorts in January that were only $14.99 at Banana that I just got click happy. These stunning "shorts" hit my knees. Eh, perhaps I'll rock the long short thing.

I did come across something fabulous. They're cashmere and satin eye

masks from Banana Republic. I wanted something to help me block out the noises and people on the plane. The front is satin and the back is cashmere. I bought two... pink for me and green for Chris. And this totally looks manly enough for Chris, right? We'll see if he uses it :-)

The Busy Before the Calm Before the Storm

I am anticipating that the week before the wedding will be the calm before the storm. Thus, this is the busy time before the calm before the storm. DIY projects are finishing up. Programs are printed and ready to be assembled. Menus are ready to be printed. The Rehearsal Dinner Video is in the final stages. Place cards are complete! SOOO, not all that crazy actually.

Obviously I had to add another project. Be as busy as possible. Why relax when you can spend hours in Photoshop?

As we're going for an old Hollywood 1940's era feeling, I thought we should make a movie poster! Casablanca was my first thought.

After a mini photoshoot and some photoshop magic, this is what I got...

I love it! Now, back to those programs.

Dear Knot, How I Love Thee

Hi, My name is Jordana and I'm a knotaholic. I love it and I need it and I miss it when it's gone. The message boards have been a godsend for me! Not being from Los Angeles, I didn't know the first thing about planning a wedding here. I had no clue what I was doing. Then I joined the Knot (OK, I actually joined the Knot the day after we got engaged because I was so super excited, but I didn't use the boards for a bit). My fellow brides are some of the most helfpul, silly, generous and fun people I've ever "met".

But last night I got to meet some of them in real life! Wendy55 and Mrs.Veroni go to my gym! We've probably passed each other a million and a half times and didn't know it! They're just as fun, humorous, silly and amazing in real life as they are through my computer screen... maybe even better!

I always thought it was a little silly/crazy to meet people from the internet, and Chris definitely thinks I'm crazy. But now I have gym buddies! And in all honesty, I've always wondered how people met other people at the gym. I don't think I've ever talked to a single soul while working out. What do you say!? "Hi, I was just noticing your tennis shoes, those are awesome! Where did you get them?" Nah, I'll stick to knottie lovin' at the gym!

A Yay/Boo

Getting married in January seemed the obvious choice as I don't like cliche & standard wedding months (goodbye February, May, June, July, August), I don't like the sound of months that end in -ber (don't know... but, so long, September, October, November & December). We were both born in March (and I like presents, so we have to spread that out over the course of a year). We were left with January and April. April gave us an 18 month engagement, and that's crazy long. JANUARY!

But getting married after the Holidays!? Yay or Boo?

Yay: Tons of time off a few weeks before the big day to get details out of the way!

Boo: I totally forgot all about Christmas and New Years as I was knee deep in details.

Yay: I didn't gain any holiday weight.

Boo: I didn't get to eat ANYTHING, and it was sad.

Yay: Who the hell gets married in January, I didn't ask a single vendor if they were booked, because everyone was available.

Boo: It's a lot harder to weed them out when all of them are out there.

Yay: WINTER WEDDING DISCOUNTS!

Boo: Itty bitty Christmas presents because all the money is flying at the wedding.

Yay: Winter wedding... white and candles and warmness in the chill. ohhhh...

Boo: 70, approximately 50% of our guest list did not RSVP. Come on people. There's a stamp... all you have to do is mark "in body" or "in spirit" and put it in the envelope and put it back in the mail box. Either you're coming or you are not coming. Get it together folks. I blame the holiday card influx and general holiday business as I hope our friends & family aren't actually quite that rude.


All in all, January is perfect for us! A bit less traditional.

I Love My Big Ass Gas Guzzler

... because yesterday I picked up an enormous table, went to Costco, hit the grocery store and picked up 4 boxes of wedding presents, along with all the other crap that usually is just hanging out.

And it all fit!!!

Down to Details

It's super detail time and I'm loving every minute of this. I mean, I've really enjoyed all 15 months of wedding planning, but spending months finding a photographer or videographer... blah. I've so enjoyed being able to cross a whole bunch of things off the list at once. And with the holidays, we've both had so much time off, that it's all been filled with wedding shiza.

Chris is editing together the video and making the condo look amazing. As I was printing labels yesterday, I look out the bedroom door and see this...

He decided, that as long as the place was a disaster and all the tools were out, he would recaulk the bathtube. Isn't his head lamp sexy?! grrr. (Again, thank God he's handy.)

Today was seating chart, water bottle, chocolate bar wrapper and favor jar day.