Wednesday, January 16, 2008
And then I get this email from my father. An email that he has sent to his listserv. To his clients. To his friends. With the title "My Daughter is Getting Married This Weekend". I think to myself "wow, he's excited. That's great!" Until I open the email. He calls Chris my "sex slave" and, in more words, lets me and the whole world know that I am so cold as to only keep them informed by email. This email, being the one sent to the bridal party and parents informing them of the times that they need to be places, because it's not the invitation time. It's a special time. Oh, and in my letting people know about where to be and when, that I forgot to mention the wedding! Obviously, I don't care about the wedding, the marriage. I care about the photos and the party. He then reposted my entire email.
A father is the person that should be there to support you. Defend you. And yet, I continually find myself protecting myself from this man that forked over some sperm 25 years ago. At what point do you stop trying to love someone that can't love you back? It seems that the only person that gets hurt is me.
I look back over what I just wrote and I realize that it was an email. An email that I can choose to let affect me. I can decide if I'm going to get myself twisted up in knots of the perception of events from a selfish, self-absorbed man. I decide how I'm going to feel.
I decide that I'm done. I decide that I am not going to spread myself so thin this weekend just to make others feel special. I've done what I can up to this point and now it's about Chris and I. It's about the life together that we are going to formalize on Saturday. It's not about making this person feel special or making that person feel included above others because they're supposed to be treated better because they're closer in the hierarchy.
It feels good to wash my hands and realize that what's done is done. People are who they are and I can't change them. The wedding will happen. The people that love us will be there. And it will be the best day of my life.
I made these for the Rehearsal Dinner. We had all these photos and no where to put them. So why not on chocolate!
I bought the giant Hershey bars at Ralphs when they went on crazy sale after the holidays. One wrapper off, a little double-sided tape, and they were done! Although, it was at this point that Chris decided I had completely gone over board with this wedding stuff. Or was it with the water bottles? Perhaps I have gone completely off my rocker...
They'll just be hanging out at the Rehearsal Dinner, on a table or something. Each one is a different photo, half of Chris and half of me. I think our guests will get a kick out them! And who can turn down chocolate?
I'm definitely digging the face angle. Must work that on Saturday.
And they're rolling in today! My most favorite sorority sister HalfCent arrives at 4:00 pm in Burbank! I told her if she could fly into Burbank that it would make my entire life. I only have to go to LAX two times in this entire wedding process and one of them is heading down for my honeymoon! The HalfCent is probably the most ridiculous person I've ever met in my entire life. She's a pile of everything cool, ghetto, preppy and sophisticated there could be. A pearl-sporting, bandana rocking, hip hop dancer who just happens to be a Vanderbilt Chemistry PhD canditate. Yes, she's going to be Dr. HalfCent. A little bit of Dr.
So, I'm wondering if today is the day it becomes real. It got real for a minute there, but that was fleeting. It was back to work and back to planning and back to errands. Today is my last day in the office. And it's just half a day! So, there's just 4 hours between me and wedding reality. Holy Shit.
Tuesday, January 15, 2008
We exchanged wedding presents on Sunday night. Our last night out together before the family starts arriving. I gave him his first. He loved the cufflinks. Little tiny red socks J Then he opened the book. The first photo is this one.
He looked at it and looked at me and looked at it again, confused. Then he blurts “Is that you!? When did I take that photo?" HAHAHA, he is my favorite photographer :-)
With each photo he said “WOW!” “Who took these?” “WOW!”. Exactly the reaction that I wanted! If you’re even considering doing this, DO IT NOW. We were both starving and he didn’t touch the salad or the appetizer when they came because he was enthralled with the book. It was good!
Then it was my turn! I knew what he was getting me, but I didn’t know that it was going to be soooooooooo perfect! See, he has no idea what to buy me. Ever. And I’ll admit, I’m a picky person. So it started with him asking general questions. Then I got specific. Then I told him exactly what I wanted. Then I sent him a link. He couldn’t get the one with that I sent him, so he went to Icing on the Ring and they made it for him. And he did a FABULOUS job.
It's an emerald cut Aquamarine stone (both of our birthstones) set in white gold. Its a perfect sized cocktail ring and I love everything about it. Plus, it will be my something blue at the wedding!
It’s a great start to wedding week!
This man is passionate about his hats. He loves them and realizes that each one is a work of art! He works at Baron Hats in Burbank and was probably the most helpful person I’ve ever met. Plus, he wears cool hats.
All of our groomsmen are wearing fedoras for picture time
I bought them on the corner of Hollywood and Highland from one of those kiosk guys. Then dressed them up with some ribbon (with careful guidance from Janice... THANK YOU!) and feathers. All in all, I'm pretty excited with how they turned out!
But Chris has a giant head and the cheapo hat wasn’t going to do the trick. He needed a fancy hat. Plus, he’s the groom. So he gets a fancy hat. Gunner hooked us up with this beauty
He added all kinds of fancy stuff! The feather is situated just the right way. It's different for a serious guy, or a kidder. Chris got the kidder version. The pin is a Chicago Pin... made famous by Al Capones' seamstress. Back in the mafia day they were real diamonds or pearls and signified how rich you were. The white band is a Chicago Strap (or Chicago something else, I can't remember). Another of Al Capones' tricks. It unhooks and connects the hat to his jacket, so it doesn't blow away in the wind. Al Capone was apparently quite influential to the hat market.
We loved it so much, that we went back two days later and bought another one for Chris’ big headed Daddy! He got his enormous hat holder from his poppy.
In other news, I love celebrities. Life&Style is my guilty pleasure. I’m not so much for all of their personal lives and whatnot, but I love what they’re wearing and hair and etc. And I get giggly when I see one. It's one of the reasons I love living in LA.
Chris: Oh, where can we see your work.
Guy: I work in a studio.
Me and Chris: ::Confused::
Chris: What do you do?
Guy: Oh, I’m in the Black Eyed Peas.
It was Will.I.Am!!! I almost blurted out that I wanted to use “I Got It From My Momma” in our Rehearsal Dinner video, but Chris vetoed me! He was a super nice guy who is also passionate about his hats. All around, I think hats are a good choice.
Sunday, January 13, 2008
Burke Williams is my new favorite place. I love the smells and the warm robes and the fruit. The lemonade was super tasty. I think I fell asleep during my massage. Chris claims that makes it a waste of money, I say that the guy did his job!
After the massage, I had a complimentary bridal bath. This only cements the idea in my mind that it is absolutely necessary to have a giant bathtub in my home. While the milk & orange bath was really nice while I was in it, I smell a little bit like infant vomit now. Ick.
Thursday, January 10, 2008
And the rings are already on the right keys!
That's going to be me next weekend! And I just realized that I'm getting married in 9 days. Just really really realized it. I mean, I know it was coming... but I got the stomach sinking, holy crap, it's really here, and, wow. Then I grinned. :-)
Then I think of how sad he must be to not be able to make it. I remember what a huge expense it is to make it out here and I am overwhelmed with gratitude for the folks that are making the trek to witness our big day.
So, we're trudging forward with our lopsided wedding party in t-9 days. Holy shit.
Wednesday, January 9, 2008
When I bought the dress I asked at BCBG and they showed me this pair. AKA the pair that I adore...
SOOOOO... there was this pair.
Carlos by Carlos Santana and I found them on Zappos.com for $99. I liked them online, but in real life they are really green and I stepped right out of them. Their 5.5 is whack, it got sent back. (Thank You Zappos for prepaid by you shipping both ways. It was sweet!)
So, to ninewest.com my fingers trotted. I found a pair!
And just as I was checking out, a little sign told me that buy 2, get ‘em 30% off. Well, I reasoned that they might not work, so I should go ahead and get a second pair. And even if I have to return them, I got the first pair 30% off. It was perfect!
I continued shopping and I found a hidden pair!
They’re almost like the BCBG pair, except without the fancy stuff. Perhaps I can fancy them up myself. Perhaps another DIY project. I’ve never DIY’d a pair of shoes. Can I do it?! Perhaps I shall!
I checked retailmenot.com and snapped up a free shipping promo code, upgraded the shipping to 3 day and I will now await my shiny pewter shoes and keep fingers crossed that they will compliment the dress. If they don’t… I go barefoot. End of story.
Tuesday, January 8, 2008
So now everything about the wedding seems to jump on me. The menus that haven't been printed. The changes that need to be accomodated. Does everyone know that there are two vendor meal times? Did I remember to set up the brunch caterer? The programs that need to be wired together.
And sitting at work trying to focus on work stuff is NOT helping. It makes me think of the tiny ends that need to be sewn up at home. booooooooo.
Eloping is suddenly looking really lovely.
Sunday, January 6, 2008
I love it! Now, back to those programs.
Saturday, January 5, 2008
But last night I got to meet some of them in real life! Wendy55 and Mrs.Veroni go to my gym! We've probably passed each other a million and a half times and didn't know it! They're just as fun, humorous, silly and amazing in real life as they are through my computer screen... maybe even better!
I always thought it was a little silly/crazy to meet people from the internet, and Chris definitely thinks I'm crazy. But now I have gym buddies! And in all honesty, I've always wondered how people met other people at the gym. I don't think I've ever talked to a single soul while working out. What do you say!? "Hi, I was just noticing your tennis shoes, those are awesome! Where did you get them?" Nah, I'll stick to knottie lovin' at the gym!
Friday, January 4, 2008
But getting married after the Holidays!? Yay or Boo?
Yay: Tons of time off a few weeks before the big day to get details out of the way!
Boo: I totally forgot all about Christmas and New Years as I was knee deep in details.
Yay: I didn't gain any holiday weight.
Boo: I didn't get to eat ANYTHING, and it was sad.
Yay: Who the hell gets married in January, I didn't ask a single vendor if they were booked, because everyone was available.
Boo: It's a lot harder to weed them out when all of them are out there.
Yay: WINTER WEDDING DISCOUNTS!
Boo: Itty bitty Christmas presents because all the money is flying at the wedding.
Yay: Winter wedding... white and candles and warmness in the chill. ohhhh...
Boo: 70, approximately 50% of our guest list did not RSVP. Come on people. There's a stamp... all you have to do is mark "in body" or "in spirit" and put it in the envelope and put it back in the mail box. Either you're coming or you are not coming. Get it together folks. I blame the holiday card influx and general holiday business as I hope our friends & family aren't actually quite that rude.
All in all, January is perfect for us! A bit less traditional.